Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Stop being so sensitive!

Around 2AM this morning I crawled out of bed, popped three Aleve and spent two hours on the living room couch whimpering, shaking my fist at the sky and generally feeling bad for myself. Why? Because, my friends, I am perhaps the only person I know who sometimes hurts themselves while sleeping. Two weeks ago I slept in kind of a funny position on my side (I guess?) and when I woke up, my right hip felt like it belonged to a 90 year old who fell while rollerblading down a mountain.

A mountain made of punches.

Anyway, some days I'm fine and some days I limp around like a wobbly pirate wannabe. Stairs are my new enemy. I have also endured a couple of sleepless night because, even while laying still on my back, my hip throbs. This injury is not especially surprising; I have similarly injured my shoulder from sleeping on my side on two or three occasions.

A couple of months ago I went to the hospital for x-rays after developing a horribly painful knee injury. That's right, developing. I hurt it by... walking around? I bruise like a banana, too, and can never figure out how it happened.

What a wimpy jerk body I have!Yup. That's me. Both in name and in love of hamburgers.


Miss Kolleen said...

You may be misaligned, have you ever seen a chiropractor? Or you may have hip tendonitis.

your giggling sister said...

You are the funniest person alive. I love your punchy mountain and your bruisy skin. Right now I even love your walkers-knee (like tennis-elbow, right?) because even though they're causing you pain, they are giving me much enjoyment.
Keep up the good work, jerk body, I can always count on you for a laugh. xoxo

your sis said...

p.s. is it bad that i have no idea who the burger dude is?

your humbled sister said...

karma's a bitch - for real! i shouldn't have been amused by your story of pain yesterday because i woke up this morning with my hip killing me - no joke!!!